I have been telling you of the darkness that befell me and the worlds I had fallen into. Today I wish to speak of the Drunken Fool. This is the tale of the woman who tore a whole into my soul just for being alive and incorporating me into her madness. (Note: Some may have taken my story so far as a hatred of women, this is not true as I do love and lust after women, I'm trying to give a visual mental image of the type of women I've come to learn to avoid. As well those whom have hurt me.)
I was at the diner like every night when I met the Drunken Fool. She was lusting after a friend of mine who had fallen for her easy ways. She was a short woman with bad teeth, but for some reason people would fall for her fake charm. I recall thinking she was a hooker or some red neck whore that was good for one thing and that was getting your dick wet. Months had passed and I saw her again and again in passing, but I lived my life and was rather content in my current discontent as the latest love in my life had called it quits and well I desired flesh and was rather like a hungry dog waiting to be fed. A conversation started at the diner regarding sex, which had my full attention when she walked in and sat by me. I was lusting after a beautiful young woman whom showed both her classy and very unclassy way of life. Something about her was intoxicating yet I met that point where I knew I could not have her. Yet far be it for me to stop trying.
As the night grew on my yearning lust grew to anticipation and near painful measures. As the pressures grew the drunken fool moved closer and closer to me. I thought nothing of it as the Diner was reaching it's late night mass and room was slowly diminishing. As the young woman I was lusting for decided to go home the conversation continued and one could see how easily I desired to get off. That is when she made her first move. She whispered in my ear about "Why chase after young things who will keep running when you can have a sure thing?" My eyes grew wide as I was not quite sure of what to think. My desire was at that point far more than my logic should have allowed, but foolishly I asked her to explain as we walked out for fresh air. She stated simply asking if I had a place we could go. My desires overcame me and as I returned inside I made clear my leaving for the night and she followed me home.
The passion was strong with me but to be honest it was mostly lust. Figuring this would be no more than a one night stand I proceeded to copulate with this fool only for it to last somewhat close to an eleven hour stint of releasing my lust. She left the following evening and was not seen for weeks. I had learned that she found another and I merrily continued on with my everyday life. Again none the wiser that she would return.
A few months later she waltzed back into my life with a beaux in hand and asked if I wished to party with them. Having nothing better to do I agreed. A few days later she asked if I'd like to go to a party with her and again I accepted. Nothing happened between us till the morning after the party. We had breakfast out and as she returned me home she broke down. Now I having been a fool myself for not being able to stand the tears of a woman asked what had happened. She informed me that her beaux had broken up with her and just needed consoling. Foolishly I tried to be a friend and this led to sex. As my room mates at the time had complained about the noise level we had she took me back to her place and this led to more sex. I should have noticed that something was amiss as she removed my box of condoms from my coat and left them at my home. As the night grew darker she continued to seduce my desires and this lead to me in desire and lust but no condom in sight. She advised she was on birth control and like a fool I believed her.
The following months I had moved due to housing issues and was miles away but still keeping touch with friends via the internet. One night I got a rather interesting message. A flaming gentleman I had once roomed with came to me with his latest bit of gossip. He advised that he had seen the drunken fool and she was with her former beaux and was with child. Intrigued I asked details that I know a man of his nature would love to know. He gave me a time line and counting back in my own head I knew what was coming next. The following evening I had received a message from the drunken fool.... asking if we could talk on the phone. She advised me that she was indeed with child and that I may be a possibility of being the father.... I was not so much shocked but rather intrigued as the word possibility was used. "How many others could it be?" I asked. Her answer was Three. I questioned further and was given the following tale:
The night of the party she claimed that lead to our further copulation she advised she had had sex earlier that day with her beaux and had been raped by the bartender of the party and then our sexual trist. I was quite in shock as she spoke nothing of this possible rape nor the sex with her former beaux. I was angry but rather entertained as well as the 33% chance was entertaining to me. I asked her to keep me up to date with the possible child that could be mine and we continued to talk on and off for the next few months. In the mean time another relationship had started in my life and I was moving forward. Until I write further.
Gui Sanmanos.
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